Self-love and healthy self-esteem

Valentine’s Day is here and we are surrounded on all sides by love. We therefore come with the topic of relationships. And our life makes them even more important. If we don’t have happy relationships, we don’t live a happy life.

And so we are mostly struggling with how to improve our current relationships. This applies to all relationships – in partnership, family, friendship and work. But what few people realise is that you need to start with yourself. If you don’t have a good relationship with yourself, you can’t have good relationships with those around you.

Self-love is more than just a nice-sounding word

A word we come across very often nowadays. But what does it mean? How do we know we love ourselves? That we really have a good relationship with ourselves?

Are you taking care of yourself? It’s the cornerstone of self-love

Whether that care is physical or psychological, we often have a tendency to neglect ourselves, while taking care of ourselves is a necessity for a happy life. We want to feel more beautiful. When we feel more beautiful, we have a healthier self-esteem. We need the care of our soul for our own satisfaction. Do what makes you happy. Best every day! Make a list of activities and rituals that make you happy, even if they’re trifles. And stick to them. We are all busy and catching up on nothing. But if you manage to complete the activity on the list the first time, it will be easier the second time.

Can you say no? Setting boundaries is also an important pillar of self-love

The word ‘no’ and its correct use play an important role in setting boundaries. If you’re not clear about what’s normal and what’s over the line, you can’t develop a healthy relationship with yourself. When you set clear boundaries and say ‘no’, you protect yourself and your relationships from the manipulation, abuse and harmful behaviour of others. Other people will only allow themselves to do as much to you as you allow them to do to you. If you feel that your efforts are in vain and others are just making fun of you, it’s time to say enough is enough. And that applies to responsibilities, tasks, but also to the people you want to surround yourself with. There is no universal guide. Something different suits everyone. It is up to each of us how we arrange it.

Do you appreciate yourself? Healthy self-esteem is also a reflection of self-love

Being aware of one’s worth, knowing how to appreciate and praise oneself is a reflection of healthy self-esteem. How does yours manifest itself? Look in the mirror. What’s the first thing that comes to your mind? Do you criticise yourself, do you have a neutral attitude, or do you smile in sympathy?

Healthy self-esteem is based on two patterns:

1. To our body – whether we accept it as it is.

2. To our inner self – whether we evaluate ourselves too critically and don’t put pressure on ourselves.

Accepting ourselves as we are, knowing our strengths and weaknesses and accepting them without judgement is a sign of healthy self-esteem. We should use our strengths for our own benefit and for the benefit of others, and keep working on our weaknesses. If we know that we cannot control our shortcomings, it is important to accept them and not judge ourselves for them. We should not have any negative feelings towards ourselves.

It is by no means easy, but neither is it impossible. Self-love is being learned by many people. It is a long-term process, but full of beautiful and liberating feelings. Do not forget to listen to your needs and live in harmony with your inner self. If you can do that, you can create beautiful relationships and help others too.

It would be nice if we all learned that, because the feeling is invaluable. If the topic appeals to you, I’d be happy to be your guide on the path to finding self-love.

Jana Stáňová – Life Coach